Discussion about this post

User's avatar
Saya, Mac & Cheese Productions's avatar

😂 👏🏽 🎉

I teach a "How not to be an asshat" course and guess what one of the lessons is? Don't make "quick" asks.

One of the fastest ways to get me bristling and annoyed ➡️ "I have a quick question." A trigger, one might say.

Perhaps quick for you to ask but almost never quick for me to answer. And you usually say "quick" cause you know you're being a bad person in some way (trying to get something for free, last minute, etc).

My default for deciding how to ask people questions related to their field without feeling like I'm freebie'ing it or devaluing them is asking myself can they yes/no/three word answer me (regardless of if just I benefit or multiple people). E.g. "What app do you use for personal budgeting?" "Do you have a book recommend for career changers?" If it's not a quick answer, I'll usually either throw it out to a group (and not tag anyone) so no one feels put upon + to get lots of weigh ins, or reach out to the person and say, "Let me know how to hire you RE [insert topic]." (I prefer people go to my FAQ or Resources pages before asking me most of those types of Qs, so I try to do the legwork on my own first before pinging someone or asking generally).

Thanks for spotlighting this, Kate!

Expand full comment
annie hickox's avatar

Very very helpful! This takes a lot of the fear out of pitching. Thanks

Expand full comment
20 more comments...

No posts